Tuesday, April 5, 2011

2011 Dallas Road Monster Drag - Results and Photos

Another banger spoke card by Halldor.
The Race:

Saturday, March 26, 2011 marked the third race of the Capital City Cycles Summer Race Series: The Dallas Road Monster Drag. 

Racers exploded out of Gyro Park at 6:30pm and tore up the (*cough*) waterfront route along Beach Drive, King George Terrace, and Dallas Road. They finished with a manic scramble up to the finish at the flagpole atop Beacon Hill Park.

This is surprisingly one of the more grueling events in the calendar even though many racers finished in under 30 minutes: it is short enough that fit riders are beat to shit at the finish because they rode it so fast, but it is just long enough that the smokers get their asses handed to them.

The Field:

The field nearly doubled from that of last year, and was certainly more diverse:

Racers ranged from 13 years-old to the mid-70's; there were Cat-1 roadies, eager weekend warriors, trusty shop-rats, and some grimy-ass messengers. The bikes included carbon fiber time-trial machines, nimble race bikes, classic fixed-gears, and even a hybrid! 

The Pre-Race:
Add caption
The pre-race at any primarily fixed-gear event is always so much more relaxed than at sanctioned races: unlike the tension you can almost smell before the start of a road race, this smelled more like Pabst and cigarettes.

Nonetheless, each had their own pre-race strategy:

Milenkovitch intimidates other racers with his peacock technique.
Jenny distracts Cam from stretching his hammies

Gillian energizes and hydrates while Derek "works the horse"

Bill simply mad-dogs the competition.

Moments before the start.
And they're off...

"I've got one hand on my drop-bar, and the other is giv'n a peace sign"

This was definitely before did a fitting on Ian's Marinoni.

Tanya and Jordan

Tanya and Jenny make it look so pleasant...somehow

Bill locks down his spoke card before disappearing into the sunset.

Kevin handed out all of the spoke cards at KGT and then we pace-lined to catch Bill.

Jeff and the drunken fans greeted racers at the top of Beacon Hill.

(Milenkovitch raced; Clare didn't. We need to work on this.)

Has anyone seen Cam? Cam? Anybody?

Bike parking is ample.

Shiniest forehead ever.

The Results
Note:  Names under 10th place are recorded in no particular order. 

The Sponsors:

We really can't put good events on without sponsorship from local businesses. They supply the prizes, the booze, and give us somewhere chill to party it up afterward. Dropping in their shops to thank them for going out of their way to support our funny little sport is good..., but dropping some money there is better. They are local; they are friends of ours; their products are brilliant. If we don't, we may soon only be left with places like MEC, Domino's Pizza and the GAP. Fuck that.

Matt at Still Life donated some sick WeSC headphones to first and second place.

Parker takes first place...again.

Rennys from Liquor Express!!!! 

Unfortunately, Rennys (pronounced "reh-nee") is unable to make it to many of the Summer Race Series events because he has to work at Liquor Express most nights (right across the street from the Brickyard). Fortunately for us, Rennys and the kind owners this fine liquor store have regularly supported our unabashed post-race frivolity by donating beverages of a refreshing and adult nature. Most of you have benefited from their generosity by now, so be sure to thank them next time you're there paying less for your booze than anywhere else in town.

Jeff presents Gillian with a delicious bottle of Forty Creek (courtesy of Liquor Express).

Jeff at Capital City Cycles hosted the race, put together a killer prize pack for third place, and proceeded to foot the bill for most of the pitchers consumed at the Brickyard after. Thanks again!

Andrew cashes in on the Capital City Cycles prize pack.

The Volunteer:
Kevin made the view atop KGT look good.
I'm sure Kevin really enjoyed standing by himself for half-an-hour, then taking all sorts of shit and abuse for fifteen minutes. Thanks for doing this again, man. Go get rad at his show at Lucky on April 13, 2011

The Protest:

Click the map.
So, there were some sour grapes about who took which route after Gonzales beach. I am fucking tired of talking about this in paragraph form, so here we go:
1. This was a gentleman's race.
2. I fucked up and completely forgot to specify which way (if any), racers should have taken at the Ross/Hollywood Crescent intersection. This mistake won't happen again. I apologize. It was my fault.
3. No racers cheated by taking one route over another (if this ruffles your feathers, please refer to #2)
4. If you still feel like you have been cheated, I will be happy to refund your entire entry fee.
5. I will not change the results (unless I have somehow omitted your name from the roster altogether).
6. The Facebook poems renewed my faith in humanity.

The After-Party:

After the mob dispersed from Beacon Hill, we regrouped at Brickyard Pizza (702 Yates). It is awesome that Ron lets us park our bikes in the secure courtyard out back; this means that you can actually ride your nice bike downtown for dinner and drinks without worrying about it getting jacked.

The beer was cheap and pizza was magical!
I think he's trying to hypnotize me.
Parker can handle his bicycle...but can he handle his pitchers?

Jamie caught in the headlights; Colin on the prowl.

Next week, we will try for "duck lips"
This photo needs a caption contest...

Ron, Mary and the other Brickyard staff put up with our shenanigans until the wee hours of the morning. Big thanks to them for giving us a great place to unwind after tearing our legs off.

The Brickyard may become the new clubhouse for the Summer Series races. 
Game on!

Thanks also to Jesse and his crew who jumped the pond to write an article about the Victoria alleycat racing scene. Hope to see you again soon.

The Next Event

Harbour Road Sprints. April 8, 7pm.

We will be trying a pre-registration system this time to make things go a little more smoothly. If you plan on making it out on Friday, drop an email to brandon(at)stuckylife(dot)com so I can add you to the list.