Friday, February 5, 2016

Blubber Burn Classic VII Race report

Rob Parkin drops in on Niteshift 
It was a rainy day in January and the fog lay heavy over mount Work. The forecast was gloomy as the deep darkness of space, and the slick rocks in the woods were begging for blood.
Seemingly unaware of these conditions, a bunch of people of questionable sanity showed up for the 7th annual Blubber Burn.
Nicholas Kupiak was on hand and documented the race with his camera. See more of his photos after the jump.

Le Mans Starting scramble

The Blubber Burn is a dumb race. It's a cross race on mountain bike trails. It's a lot of fun, but it's not for someone looking for a relevant training effort or someone who takes himself/herself too seriously. It's the Island's most technical cross race and it's good for testing your technical abilities and short term endurance in the beginning of the season. It's actually not long enough to burn any blubber, but it is a nice way to kickstart your season if you are into the whole 'fun' thing.
Two dozen racers toed the line in the mud and about 2/3rds of them finished the race. The Blubber Burn is not only about speed, it's about flat awareness, conservation of bike parts and pacing.

Highly unreliable and unprofessional results:

Men: 
1 Parker Bloom (sscx) In a blistering 28.30 Ish... total time
2 Jamie Cameron (sscx)
3 Clay Webb (sscx)
4 Matt Hornland (geared cx)
5 Steven Grandy (SS mtb)
6 Ricky Allen (SS mtb)
lost track after that...

Women:
1 Rachel Lynn Carey (sscx) Rachel also took the under 19 overall and first ss woman-Very impressive
2 Janice Meek (Geared cx) Janice took the honours of being the oldest Racer at 57. Kick ass performance.

Best Dressed: Leif Keithley 
Clay "Old man fucking Mountain" Webb

The sport of Cyclocross has been rife with Controversy lately so it comes up as no surprise that some grumblings have come up with Parker's choice of race line this year. Strava illustrates questionable "Canadian" line, but upon questioning, Mr. Bloom has claimed GPS drift. An eyewitness has claimed this to be true but will not confirm it publicly. A report has been filed with NASA, Aphex twin and the Lada Automaker R&D devision. We await their decision, but as of now the result stands.

Parker in Electric green.
Renny!
Three things stood out this year:

1: The shocking lack of "Race Clothing" clearly illustrated by the winner of the Best Dressed category. This Category is often highly contested and it is concerning to see this low point. Are we collectively loosing our sense of humour?
Leif Keithly (@numberonephotog) took the honours simply by wearing a yellow button up cardigan with the Wellburn's Food marked logo stenciled on it. He wore it extremely well however and was deserving of his Golden Draak.

2: the flat mayhem on the third lap. This race has always been flat heavy but this year there was a traffic jam in the "pits" and people were lining up to use the Two floor pumps on site. I'd say a good rule of thumb for the Blubber Burn is to take your normal CX race pressure and multiply it by two. Let that be a lesson!

3: Singlespeeds: Everyone on the podium was riding a singlespeed (well, apart from Leif who was really only up there for his fashion sense). Maybe the race just attracts a certain crowd? It's definately not the most singlespeed friendly but then again, if you pick a low enough gear it's not the worst for singlespeeders.
Drew had a ripping start
Parker's steady pace earned him the top spot on the podium
Ricky Allen on a singlespeed rigid mtb
Blake Takes a handup for good luck


Thanks to everyone for showing up!

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